Small Change
by J.R. Huber
The first change I noticed was the toilet paper roll. I almost got in a fight with my wife over it. When I noticed the firm cardboard cylinder with the outer layer of white paper I assumed she had switched brands. I mentioned it and she said it was the same kind she always buys. I said she must have switched, or the package would say new and improved or something, they always do. She said I was trying to start a fight over nothing, so I dropped the issue.
A couple days later, while having coffee with a friend, the issue came to mind and I asked if they thought I was being a Jerk, but the conversation got all weird and confused. By the end it was clear they thought any sort of cardboard roll was weird because it should obviously be plastic like always.
When I got home that evening I checked the TP in both bathrooms and every single roll had a white plastic cylinder. Not the normal cardboard, and not the way it was when I first noticed a change. This was a second change.
It was weird, disturbing, and a little scary. I decided not to talk about it to anyone. I tried to suppress the significance of it. I tried to stop my mind from thinking through scenarios of brain tumors, insanity, etc.
It was less than a week later that my pants changed. The back pockets were bigger. The front pockets had funny pleat things in them. I checked all my pants and while there were differences in the front pockets from pair to pair they all had big back pockets.
On my way to work each day I kept seeing possible changes everywhere. Did that sign have that reflective look last week? Wasn't the picture on that billboard different yesterday? That coffee shop should be called ParkSide Cafe. Those lines used to be more yellow, they're too orange now.
It messed me up quickly. So many things could have explanations. Businesses change names, billboards get new ads, new types of signs or traffic lights get installed. Who the hell keeps close enough track of such things to be sure?
I started taking pictures of things with my phone, but most of the time when I noticed a change it was somewhere I hadn't taken a picture. Eventually there were changes in places I had taken pictures, but the pictures agreed with the changes, not with my memory.
My stress level was through the roof and I needed to break out of the insanity. I stopped taking pictures. I stopped looking for changes. If I encountered a change I just ignored it and moved on. I made a conscious effort to be more mellow about everything. I became mister agreeable. No arguing over details, no attempt to prove someone wrong. Lots of nodding and saying I know what you mean.
Things were far from perfect, but I was getting by. It was becoming normal. I was getting used to it. So what if some things seemed different from day to day? So what if my pants now all had small back pockets today? I managed to live in my little denial world for a few weeks.
The money started changing. Bills that had funny little fibers in the paper, tiny printing you could barely see, and portraits changing size and position. But I tried very hard to ignore it and pretend the bills I was seeing were new, recently printed, and by some weird coincidence the only bills I ever saw. I think I could have got by with that pretense if it hadn't been for the coins. Coins of the wrong size, made of weird alloy, so obviously different from any I've seen in my life, and yet the dates are up to ten years old. Ten years old! I couldn't pretend that away. I had to start thinking outside the box.
Parallel universe? But, if I was switching to another universe, where is the other me? Are they switching to another universe as well?
Time travel? Maybe someone is changing things in the past and I am able to somehow remember the way things used to be. That seems more likely. Ha! How insane is that? Time travel seeming like a more likely option.
But why am I the only one who notices a change when it happens? Or am I? Maybe others are experiencing it as well, and the money stuff is so obvious.
Any idea how worthless search engines really are? Articles about how the Internet is changing the nature of money, or Wikipedia articles on money changers, or YouTube videos about insane money changing magic tricks, are not going to help. I guess Search engines are designed to show what most people are trying to find. Most people are not trying to find information to help them determine if they are switching universes, suffering the effects of time travelers changing the past, or going insane.
I need to find out if others have noticed any changes, have any ideas about what could be happening, or advice on what I should do. So here I sit typing this up, on a website, in the hopes that readers of such a site might have some ideas they can post in the comments that might help me.
By the way, I noticed this morning that the TP has gone back to brown cardboard in the center. But the money is still screwy, that's for sure. I know damn well that all my life a penny was a copper coin about an inch in diameter, not some weird alloy coin around a half inch in diameter. Please someone tell me you have noticed at least that small change?
© 2017 Jeffery Robert Huber